Summer comes but once a year


until 26th August

Make the most of this week with tonight’s Trivia QUIZ (now with added pie),
luncheon treats Tuesday-Saturday inclusive
Wine Wars – Thursday – Chilean wine and platters

Get tickets for the HA HA Hassocks event (30 August) – or while we’re closed from Vanilla (Hurstpierpoint); Marchants Estate Agents or Keymer & Hassocks Sports & Social Club

Next up …Golf – Sunday 19/7/15



Hassocks Open PAirs event.  So for July it’s another sporting event to have a go at.  You don’t need to be good, but knowing which end of the club is which would help some. Cost is £60 for a pair for which you get food and golf and prizes and probably more food and I’m sure there will be some drink in there too. Food from 11am.. Plus get back and watch the denouement of the Open from St Andrews in the Hassocks club house with very large screens

This is the 5th annual running of the event and it’s time to try and dethrone the tenacious paring of Seaford Page and Farnham Rd Foreshaw. You don’t have to provide a pair – we can team you up with a suitable partner so If you are interested email, or pop into the purple carrot to sign up

fAT bOYS iNVITATIONAL TOURNAMENT 2015 – the final whistle

 “Nothing Ever Happens in Hassocks

a series of fortunate events “

JuNE 6 – Fat Boys  football tournament

The day started with the absence of the much heralded pie oven and a slightly concerned organiser begging on the good graces of his lovely wife – who had taken the transportation device to Littlehampton for body shop succour – These, my good reader, are ultimately the real reasons for the Cobras poor showing (not a lack of team members or cohesiveness, no goal scorer and a lack of talent – no they were secondary issues) How we were going to cook the pies was wot dun for us.


The Original Whippets

The Original Whippets

The tournament, conceived in 2010 with 4 teams, this year grew to 11, with The Fat Boys (former whippets) on a three year winning streak having not lost a game since 2011, and with goalkeeper supreme Scott away on England duty, surely this was a time to test their invincibility?


Cobras - all stood up at once! Ash probably slide tackling someone...somewhere

Cobras – all stood up at once! Ash probably slide tackling someone…somewhere

You might have thought that with only 4 players available for their first match that things would start badly for  HOGS FC (one of several new teams to the tournament)but no they  still ran out 3-0 winners over a sorry shambles of spitting Cobras, we have no photograph evidnce of them being there – but I do know an overall 4th placed finish was a good start to their tournamnet involvement.

Over the course of a long afternoon many games ebbed and flowed, new teams all aquitted themselves well and entered into the friendly spirit of the occassion – just enough competitive edge to make it interesting, not so much as to be a constant handbag fest – some old scores were settled – 7SIS recording a controversial win over their 11 a side nemesis Rottingdean Greens yet no one left utterly defeated or overwhelmingly triumphant, well actually they did but it all felt very enjoyable so we’ll try the same thing again next year

This year even with 10 games each it all boiled down to a late encounter between the development day winners – Norfolk NC – and the brand spanking new team of YounG’Uns –

Perhaps it was the occasion, perhaps Georges party was on everybody’s mind? but in  the end Norfolk ran out 3-0 winners, their best result of the day, as the Guns suffered their only defeat of the tournament – perhaps they should have worn the pink more often?

So much much hair product. Norfolk NC the car park shoot

So much skill…so much hair product. Norfolk NC the car park shoot

For the rest of us? Well four of the top five places were taken up by new teams – but there really wasn’t much in it – as 11th was also from the new tranche – and all the teams were capable of putting a good result alongside a bad one, just for some of us the good was rather outweighed by the not so good. 7sis will be pleased to finish above Rotters, Cobras can’t believe they weren’t bottom, GL Rangers won best presented team in lovely matching tops, HOGS finally made it up to six players, Quaggy came through the rank of abject misery last year for a respectable finish without their Barry talisman, Quixote are now a team to be reckoned with, Fire – well they had a lovely day out

Teams Points goals for against diff
1 Norfolk N Chance 24 15 0 15
2 Youn G uns 21 11 5 6
3 Fat Boys 19 9 7 2
4 HOGS FC 18 14 6 8
5 GJ Rangers 16 8 2 6
6 7SIS 13 10 13 -3
7 Hassocks Quixote 13 8 13 -5
8 Quaggy Wanderers 8 4 12 -8
9 Rottingdean Greens 7 4 8 -4
10 Real Social Cobras 7 2 8 -6
11 Friday Fire 5 3 14 -11



Fans swarmed to the game of the day

Fast paced action in what turned out to be the Championship decider

Fast paced action in what turned out to be the Championship decider




Hassocks Quixote – The Conrad shoot – Still a few Windmills to topple yet but a good first showing in the main event

Rottingdean Greens - a change of colour might help results next year

Rottingdean Greens – a change of colour might help results next year




A group of Rangers - the GLee type

A group of Rangers –  the GLee type

Friday Fire - perhaps Saturday was a day too late this year?

Friday Fire – perhaps Saturday was a day too late this year?


Quaggy is as Quaggy does

Quaggy is as Quaggy does


Youn G uns limbering down

Youn G uns limbering down




Player of the tournament – with his “Jeff the chauffeur” sidekick

Wine Wars continues… Cutlack cuts the mustard

2015 has got off to a slow start but after an excellent prelim 2nd round (Giles’ honeyed tones once more hung over the tasting rooms of the purple carrot like a bee eating through cheese) judging the Whites of Argentina/Brazil, Hungary, South Africa and Portugal we have a clear winner to don their battle armour and join the main event.

This year we are approaching things slightly differently.  Each evening will be devoted to a particular country and wines from different regions within that country, a showcase of their wares. There will once again be titbits of food to nibble on during the evening with some “close” approximation to what you might hope to find should you visit the country in question. We’re still scoring the wines as we like an element of friendly completion and a leader-board will be produced to see who will face Australia (2014 champions) in the grand final on 11 December.

Dates are as follows and pre-booking is always advisable as places are limited – £15 in advance, £17.50 on the night.  All evenings are 7.45 with an 8pm start

Friday 3rd July = Spain
Thursday 6th August = Chile
Thursday 17th September = France
Friday 2nd October = New Zealand
Thursday 12th November = Italy
Friday 11th December = Australia v Highest Scoring Country from rounds

oh the clear winner – Portugal, who we will fit in somewhere after Italy in November

Events r Us

How does a small coffee shop on the wrong side of the tracks survive when there are just soooooooooo many other competitors with better premises, more staff and more money, – flipping heck even the Deli (no offence) has got some cracking (PURPLE!) chairs in it’s window offering a lovely vantage point to see and be seen! We instead have an internal water feature when it rains that hasn’t been fixed in 18 months. Perhaps that’s the secret
Or perhaps it’s that we offer the best coffee? Or perhaps it’s because we really do cook our own food, and cakes, and cater to and for dietary requirements and offer people what they ask for not what it says on the packet?

Or maybe it’s that we don’t just expect people to venture out of their comfort zone of Keymer Road, The Hassocks High Street, so we put on events, and try to encourage people to do something a little bit different. With that in mind let me tell you a bit about what’s Coming Up soonish

Friday 22 May The Hassocks Hash – technically not organised by the Purple Carrot but for the last 25 months every 4th Friday has seen us open our doors for people of all ages to rock up and run off, sometimes when they get back they even stay and chat, meet other runners, talk about training, their goals, occasionally even have a drink and a bite to eat.  This is a free event and is open to all – gun goes at 7.30pm prompt. –

From Sunday for the half term week we will be offering a very limited service as most of the staff will be in Cornwall getting wet for a few days in a big tent in a big field  – so if you’re thinking of popping in for a bite to eat give us a call first to make sure we’re there (01273 841296).

Monday 1 June THE Quiz – apparently too hard for The Legion regulars who are running scared of being humbled. They shouldn’t worry as half the fun of the evening is everyone roundly cursing the Quiz master, and suggesting it was better in the Greyhound, but not as funny – the jackpot currently stands at around £50 and while you’re pouring over your table round we offer such luxury as a cheeky cheeseboard supplemented with a well deserved bottle of wine – or why not indulge in our growing range of dips, flatbreads and olives and a local beer? (7.30 for 8pm start – £2pp)

Thursday 4 JuneWine Wars part 2 – It’ll be all WHITE on the night. Punning apart there will be some stunning wines to compliment the excellent food fare This is Part 2 of our new countries involvement in this years wine wars.
We’ve done the reds so now it’s the turn of the whites from South America (Brazil & Argentina), South Africa, Portugal and the return of the Austro-Hungarian empire.
Not sure which country is out in front after the reds round, Giles is keeping it all close to his chest, but I do know there were several people emerging from the basement with very happy faces – Neil and Pauline really liked the Romanian with their cheeseboard on the Saturday afterwards.
Food will again be a close approximation of what might be found in the countries concerned, there may be a couple of dishes the same as the last lot all went rather quickly – and we’ll also have a favourite bottle of wine to be given away in the prize draw. Don’t leave it too long as this one is getting booked up.
£15 – £17 on the night

Saturday 6 JuneFat Boys Invitational 7 a side Football Tournament.  Now in its sixth year the tournament goes from strength to strength.  What started out as a little get together of 4 local teams is now putting interested parties from as far away as Hurstpierpoint on a waiting list! The fun starts at 12.30pm on the Downlands School all weather pitches until 4.30pm.  Food and trophies, winners speeches, and the champions league final will all take place from 5pm onwards in Adastra Park at the Keymer & Hassoks Sports and social Club.  Why not come along and enjoy the mayhem?

Whine, Whine, WINE

Just been trolling through – actually u can’t say that anymore can you – I mean slowly reading through some of the local facebook group pages and it all seems rather sad. Small issues become complex problems and people do like to jump off the deep end into Offended City. So I thought I’d take this opportunity to remind people that they can have a proper wine – or 8 even – at the Purple Carrot Wine Wars on Friday night – 7.45 for 8pm start. I thought I better remind you as it seems most people have forgotten it’s on, and it is indeed ON.

This month we have entitled the event  “Are you “red”dy for the weekend? ” and we have done this because we are trying out just red wines – and that makes it very punny

New countries start their involvement in this years wine wars. Reds from South america (Brazil & Argentina), South Africa, Portugal and the return of the Austro-Hungarian empire kick off with 2 reds from each area. (Next month June 4th… two whites from each).   Simple really. Southdowns Cellars provide more wines of distinction – Oh and Giles says that if we don’t get a good turnout he’s going to spit his dummy and return to tennis coaching…his fate is in your hands.

This also means that I’ll be trying to come up with a few “authentic” recipes from the countries concerned to compliment the wines – no hot melon this month I’m afraid :0{ – and we’ll also have a favourite bottle of wine to be given away in the prize draw

You know where we are, so get yourselves over – I’m fed up of talking to the mint and basil

FEVER = closure

Unfortunately we’re closed today due to fever and general un-wellness. This obviously is a bit of a bind and puts Thursday nights WINE WARS in jeopardy, but should be okay by Friday at least for the POP Quiz, and Saturday’s first Supper Club.
I’ll keep you posted – I can write but not really talk.
Last night I worked out a whole Manuka Honey conspiracy and how people got really bad coughs and colds to smuggle the highest quality nectar in. I was ready to expose the whole tawdry trade this morning, but apparently it isn’t actually happening.

April is the cruelest month…

Well it is according to old misery Thomas Stern Elliot, but what did he know anyway? Then again I suppose he was quite a good poet and social commentator, and what he was really saying was something about Spring being a time of new beginnings which were not always easily come by.

What I hear you question – if you have got this far – does this have to do with the lovely purple carrot? Good question. strictly speaking nothing.

Coming at the question from a slightly different angle, still not much, but as we continue into our  fourth year we still have growing pains as we try to accommodate a very wide range of ideas and interests from the basics of food and drink to the wider areas of events and community participation.  Every so often it means we need to shift things around so we can offer something better.  so why I’m I bleating on like this? simply to tell you all the following news…

Closed today – Tuesday 7 April for stock taking and stock re-ordering

Pie n Ale evening is being pushed back to Thursday 23 April so we can get the pies made, and the people through the door

In the meantime next week we do have some very definite events taking place which are well worth the effort / expense.

Thursday 16 April – 7.45 for 8pm start – Wine Wars 2015 starts with an all White evening with some delicious offerings from four different countries and some excellent nibbles as might be found to accompany them in their natural habitat – £17

Friday 17 April – 7.30 for 8pm start – Pop Wars, or more commonly known as Popular Paul’s Pop Quiz – Quizziness all over the place with fajitas or falafel on the food menu – £8.50

Saturday 18 April – 7.30pm Saturday Supper Club – our first forray into the murky world of providing a set menu, rather than pandering to your every whim !! This month the theme has been chosen by birthday girl Phillipa. Okay she crashed and burned at the Trivia quiz but eyes lit up at the mention of a green curry so this month it is FAR EAST FUSION – £20

Sunday 19 April – 11.30am Golf at Eastbourne Downs – The DOGs (decidedly ordinary golfers society) is a rag-tag loose mix of people and abilities who play once a month around the south east. Costs are kept to £27 a time to hopefully allow access to everyone who needs a game. New people are always welcome. This month incorporates bacon butty and coffee, round of golf and some prizes, plus a truly awesome trophy for the winner

Monday 20 April – 7.30pm Books, Films and Cake Symposium – the purple carrots take on what a  book club could be. Feed the mind soul and body. Feel free to turn up and chat, discuss whether you should read the books (this month The Art of War , Strangers on a train, I conquer the castle) go leftfield into films with no connection whatsoever, eat or bring cake to munch, swill it down with a glass of wine / cup of tea / bottle of Ale – job’s a good ‘un – £5

Also we are looking for people who might like to put in the odd shift or three at the purple carrot over the coming months and years. There are no set shift patterns, some evenings, early mornings, weekend work likely to be in the mix – although there’s definitely not enough work to call it anything more than casual – ,the wages are rubbish, the proprietor is always grumpy, you’ll be expected to make the best cup of coffee with terrible training, it’s mostly cleaning really, kudos levels will be set back several years, you have to be nice to the clientelle.  Would suit people who are glutton’s for punishment, can look after things when necessary, have no life – so they can drop everything at a minutes notice – like working in different environments at strange times, have a high tolerance threshold, can cook / bake a bit too. Have I described you? If so do get in touch….