Tango, Foxtrot, Hotel, Mike? no it’s Whiskey …very soon

Friday 10 February @The Purple Carrot, Hassocks –         7.45pm for 8pm start

Finally – only 2 years in the making but now it’s time to try 7 mouthwateringly good whisky / whiskey from around the globe.

The Purple Carrot, in association with South Downs Cellars, presents Burns night my eye this is super taster heaven in Hassocks

Think you know your whiskey? Prepare to has your thoughts rethunk. We aim to provide a (less than) definitive guide to some of the best single malt varieties and beyond, in the world. Idle boast? come and find out.
Food and coffee will also be provided to help temper your tasting and sate your stomach

booking is always advisable, a £5pp deposit is required, as places are limited. £17.50 in advance, £20 on the night. All evenings are 7.45 with an 8pm start   (01273 841296 / m:chris@thepurplecarrot.org / fb thepurplecarrot)

Ha HA HAssocks presents – The Maine Event – Saturday 18th March

who are, in fact, a band, and possibly not very funny, just exceedingly good – so we’ll kick it off with a loverly bit of comedy first
Buy tickets for Ha Ha Hassocks - Stand-up Comedy
 Ha HA HAssocks presents an evening of comedy and music with all profits going to The Alzheimer’s Society
HA HA Hassocks @ The Hassocks… In Hassocks

  • Top UK comedians
  • Music from The Maine Event
  • The Noblest of DJ sets
  • Fully licensed bar
  • Hassocks Hotel Basket meals available
  • Tickets available at local outlets and online

This month we welcome ……….Guest MC Rob Thomas

Image result for rob thomas comedianRob Thomas – “What a great compere. His audience interaction was excellent and his gags were superb.” Martin Mullaney, Cheeky Monkey Comedy.

Rob Thomas is a quirky, energetic, storytelling comic currently racing up the comedy ladder like a squirrel on Red Bull. Rob has performed at the Edinburgh Fringe and the Leicester Square Theatre with the likes of Milton Jones, Jo Brand and Stewart Lee, and is as comfortable in front of a packed theatre as he is in the upper room of a local pub.

He got the silver medal in the UK Pun Championships 2015, the Reading Comedy Festival New Act of the Year 2014 award and the Montreux Comedy Festival New Act (UK Region) for 2014 and 2015. In short, he’s funny


and Rob has the pleasure of introducing us to…

Image result for president obonjoPresident Obonjo… is a mock Nigerian dictator complete with full military regalia. He’s very very different and very good. He plays around with our cliched observations of Nigerians / africans and of course because he is of african origin himself he can totally get away with it. Or put it another way, he’s the only person who could get away with it, which is why it’s unique.

“President Obonjo has everything you’d expect of a tinpot African dictator: an Army uniform full of self-awarded medals and the forceful, booming rhetoric of a strong, if corrupt, leader. It’s a great comic construct, with lots of seized opportunities for playing with the cliches. ” – Chortle critic

Darius Davis… is a more traditional stand-up, but he’s very energetic, quite brash but has a loveable streak. Darius is a seasoned performer first cutting his teeth in 2007 in the comedy clubs of New York city. Success quickly followed as Darius won an MTV New Talent contest, opening the door for Darius to strut his stuff on MTV america. Alas due to “visa irregularities” Darius soon found himself back, and uncelebrated in London.

Certain that success would be just as swift, Darius launched himself on the UK comedy scene. In the blink of an eye (four and half years later) Darius found himself gigging regularly up and down the country entertaining the crowds with his high-energy, captivating, and hilarious tales.

“This guy is amazing” – Scott Mills, BBC Radio 1


FOLLOWING swiftly on the heals of this excellent comedy comes MUSIC from The Maine Event

They’re back! Following their sell out gig at Hassocks golf club, Hassocks and Hurst’s very own rock band The Maine Event return for one night only. Presenting rock (and just a bit of funk!) from the 60s to the present day.

Featuring Dan Jenkinson, Phil Noble, Rob Worthington and Pete Robinson

You can’t afford to miss them!”

Not satisfied, want more? The evening will continue a pace until there’s no more to wring out of it with the Noblest DJ set of tunes to close it up and shut it down until the witching hour
Buy tickets for Ha Ha Hassocks - Stand-up Comedy

Material may not be suitable for younger audiences (Under 18’s with parental approval only).

ROAR – right of admission refusal.

Acts can be subject to change.

Tickets ordered online are subject to a booking fee.

Where can I contact the organiser with any questions?

email: chris@thepurplecarrot.org, or come into the purple carrot, 4 Stanford Terrace, Hassocks


Today see’s the running (literally) of the 50th Hassocks Hash, a social run for people of all abilities and motivations to come together, head out onto the roads, Downs in the Summer months, get a bit of a sweat on,  perhaps down a milkshake, beer, glass of wine and have a chat with whoever about whatever, then go on their merry way nicely set up for the weekend and further.

I mention this not because of any great passion I have with running (I do not), or drinking, or the fact that it has started and finished at the Purple Carrot from day one (coincidental) but that for 50 consecutive months a mass of different people from the local area have got together sun, wind, rain, hail, snow, all five elements together! any number of people (from 9 to about 42 I seem to recall) of any age (under 10 to well into their 60’s – possibly older!) have kept this free, and open to all, run going into a 5th year  and I take my hat off to you all.

Tonight starts at 7.30pm prompt from The Purple Carrot – it might be cold, but you’ll get a warm welcome…

It’s happening again

So it’s the new year. Shall we do a quiz? oh, well, maybe then….

WHAT!!!! of course we will – it’s ON – bring your best trivia head and get stuck into the new year with fiendish questions and awesome anagrams, grainy pictures and leaps of logic.

Jackpot round somewhere between £50 and £100 !

Go on – indulge your host – you might even enjoy it. Monday 9 January 7.30pm for an 8pm start @thepurplecarrot – £2.50 pp

Coming up in January

well just a couple of things so far

Mon Jan 2nd sees the return of the Fat Carrot Development Tournament, an amalgamation of the Fat Boys Football tournament and the desperate need for the Purple Carrot to put it’s name to a trophy. A recent development in our football tournament pantheon some people are just so crazy for the action they must get a game in between Christmas and New Year, and who are we to do anything but help facilitate this need. 2017 – to be played January 2nd 12-2pm previous winners 2016 – Friday Fire; 2105 – Cuckfield Heathens 2017 round robin schedule  Food from 2.30pm @ Adastra Park Keymer & Hassocks Sports & Social Club. Do come and watch these crazy people, it only encourages them

Sun Jan 8th – just as crazy are the DOG Soc golfers who hold their annual 3 (no 4 club) challenge at Waterhall when it’s cold, preferably blowing a hooley, but ideally not raining – want to join in contact –  email socistydogs@gmail.com or   txt 07814360341

Fri Jan 20th – Paul’s popular pop quiz returns yet again to the Purple Carrot with food and fun – £9 with the food, £4.50pp without. This one is starting to fill up fast so do let us know if you are coming, with or without a team. 7.30pm for 8pm start

Fri Jan 27th – Hassocks Hash hits 50!!! Our little social run hits a half century of occurrences – you know you’re very welcome to join in from a tiddler (4km) to something a bit more strenuous 8-10km, then talk about it for the rest of the evening over a drink and nibbles – 7.30pm start


that’s it for now but keep your eyes peeled, and ears to the ground for more tasting evenings and more comedy specials to come in the near future

THE TREASON SHOW – review of the year – 9 December 2016 in HAssocks – with added Jazz bits

Did everything really go wrong in 2016? Get a little help reviewing the last 12 glorious months from the Treason Shows no holds barred approach to telling it how it is. If you missed little Britain tugging itself away from combustible Europe, while the great and the good filed their exit papers and fled to the afterworld, including the last great leader of the free world (well Cuba) leaving his socialist legacy to be taken on by the next US president, then this is the show for you.

Buy tickets for The Treason Show
Ha Ha Hassocks presents the Treason Show review of the year @ Adastra Hall. All the best bits of a crazy year, made slightly more crazy by Mr Brailsford and his troupe of willing satirists

Doors open at 6.45pm for those of you who just don’t want to go home, and the evening kicks off with some excellent jazz and blues from Lou B and ace jazz guitarist Nils Solberg; food starts from 7.30, feast on three courses of hand crafted food, but if you’re not eating you can always enjoy a bar packed with localness,  and snooze gently through the high class horesplay from Mark and the Treason gang as they look back on a year of awe and wonderment, and most probably a lot of breathtaking stupidity from the grate(ing) and the goode

ts-poster-xmas-16-hassocks-image  Ha Ha Hassocks logo blackImage result for lou beckerman jazz singer

Upcoming @ The Carrot and beyond

Quick re-blog with ALL dates correct this time. Yes The Red Wine Final tasting is definitely on a Thursday 15th December – and it’s filling up fast

(Mainly) Evening Events

Tuesday 22nd – Knit & Natter – 7pm

Thursday 24th – Paul’s Popular Pop Quiz – 7.30 for 8pm start £8.50 (£4.50 without food)

Friday 25th – Light-up Hassocks (Keymer Road) 4-7.30pm; Hassocks Hash Social run 7.30pm prompt

Saturday 26th – St Lawrence Pop-up Pub “The Lawrie” @st. lawrence school hall – 7pm –


Thursday 1 Dec – Guides Hot Chocolate & Film night 7pm

Friday 2nd  Dec – Wine Wars: WHITES ONLY FINAL – Pinot Grigio take on the might of Sauvignon Blanc – a titanic battle will ensue- 7.45pm for 8pm start  – £17 (includes accompanying food)

Monday 5 Dec -THE MONTHLY QUIZ – 7.30pm for 8pm start £2.50pp (£7 with pie!)

Tues 6 Dec – Knit & Natter – 7pm

Friday 9 Dec – Ha HA Hassocks presents – The Treason Show @ Adastra Hall – £15 (£30 with food) – Now with added JAzz as Lou and friend welcome you to what promises to be an excellent evening

Saturday 10th Dec – Pop-up shop @ the purple carrot 3pm-9pm

Sunday 11th – Golf day @ Burgess Hill The DOGs return for their end of season spectacular finish The Wrap-up – Breakfast roll-up @thepurple carrot from 9.45am. First tee 11.30am, followed by some nosh @ the Barn – £20

Thursday 15th  Dec – Wine Wars: better RED than dead – book quick space going fast for this one. Heavyweight “Cab Sav” – definitely the wine that has swung it Australia’s way for the last two years takes on the sophistication of Spain and the tempting Tempranillo grape – 7.45pm for 8pm start  – £17 (includes accompanying food)

Fri 16th Dec – Wine and platters evening – from 7.30pm

Ha HA Hassocks presents -The Treason Show – Fri 9 December @ Adastra Hall

Buy tickets for The Treason Show
Ha Ha Hassocks presents the Treason Show review of the year @ Adastra Hall. All the best bits of a crazy year, made slightly more crazy by Mr Brailsford and his troupe of willing satirists

Good for – singles, couples, groups of friends, staff “Christmas do’s”,

Not Good for – grumpy miserable buggers, under 16’s ! people who prefer to spend £40 for a night in Brighton with average food and average entertainment with the added excitement of crap trains and expensive parking

Should I bring a first date? Depends if you want a second one….

tickets on sale through the purple carrot, Marchants Estate agents and at “Light Up Hassocks” event, really really soon

£14.75 if bought before December, £17.50 if you’re a last minute chancer!

£29.75 with food – 3 courses (pate platters with prosecco, Venison Pie or veggie alternative / Dreamy sweet treats) NB: food orders will not be taken on the night.

hopefully a band, or at least some form of musical expresionism (definitely a word); a bar packed with localness; and obviously high class horesplay from Mark and the Treason gang as they look back on a year of awe and wonderment, and most probably a lot of breathtaking stupidity from those wot fill the column inches


Buy tickets for The Treason Show

MacMillan – World’s biggest Coffee Morning

Today is MacMillan coffee morning.

Homes and businesses across the country eating cake and drinking tea and coffee and putting the donations to cancer support. Being a coffee bar we’re at a bit of an advantage to sort that out properly so Wateraid can take a back-seat today and instead we’ll donate 50p of every coffee, tea, cake we sell today to MacMillan cancer support. Can’t make it to the carrot? Haley at Reflex is on the high street is doing one too so no excuses.