Five Fabulous Future Friday fun-Filled Functions For u to come to

Friday 1 – 29 AprilPaul’s Pop Quiz returns, as does the popular host.  Come and gawp at the purple suited one as he joyously dances around his adoring public .  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE GOOD AT POP QUIZZES to thoroughly enjoy this evening of entertainment. Also guesting this month on the food front will be Karen Lee (of the sensitive foodie fame) offering an excellent sweet potato dish to prove that not all Vegans are bad people!! Food from 7.30 quiz starts at 8pm. You will need to book, or at least check in, if you haven’t already as space is getting limited

Friday 2 – 6 May – The Great Hassocks GRAPE-OFF – Wine Wars 2016 returns to batter your tasting senses. Other paler village imitations will be tolerated but you won’t better the hardcore Giles Cutlack (Southdowns Cellars top man) on the dance-floor of winning wines, the gulping gourmet, king of the gurgle and glug, a grape grape man indeed. Anyhow enough of the alliterative punning, suffice to say that this year, having had Australia come out top of Hassocks’ favourite wine producing country two years in a row it is now time to find out which grape really floats your boats. Over the coming 7 months we’ll be taking 16 major grape varieties and mercilessly squeezing the best out of them to leave us with just two in the December final.  Bookings in person at the Purple Carrot, email, facebook or phone to book your place

Friday 3 – 13 MayHa Ha Hassocks – stand-up comedy @ the Hassocks Hotel. So the conversation may have gone something like this (if it had happened) Hey Stephen it will be good to have you back to restore order and calm to those rowdy young ladies that like to natter rather than lap up every syllable of comedic wit and insight?  “I’m pine-ing” sorry to hear that “I’m pine-ing for the Fjords” what? “there’s Nor-way you’re going to get me to do it” Please?  “I have to go to the depths of Nordic lands to fulfill my obligations to Santa and his merry reindeer” Really? “Yes really, I’d rather be cruising” But what about the good people of Hassocks and surrounding areas (excepting the independent mirthless republic of Ditchlin-where-‘r’u’all) who wait on your every harangue and put-down? “You’ll just have to LAP-it-Up” Okay so I’ll put away the bribe complimentary bribe tickets for the Head of the local infants school for this month then “gosh darn it yes best to keep the powder dry on that one” So what are we going to do? “Fortunately I have a willing goat to the slaughter” sorry? “A guest compare of estimable charm and verve, he’s very good you know” Will he sort out any rowdies? “Oh yes indeedy, you’re going down if you take on Maff Brown…”

So unfortunately there will again be no Stephen Grant, cus he can’t,  but the most excellent Maff Brown will be taking on the compare duties and inviting you to be entertained by Andrew Bird, Josh Dillon, Jake Howie and Jarleth Regan…and all for only £13.50 – tickets from the Purple Carrot or online (Hassocks Comedy / Purple Carrot events)

Friday 4 – 20 May –  – Now we are 4 and all grown up. Help us celebrate. 4 years of fun rolled into one at the Purple Carrot. We’ve now been open 4 years and as a thank you for your custom we thought we’d put on a little something extra special to give Hassocks and her many commuters a happy hug, but we couldn’t think of anything special enough to fit the bill so perhaps we’ll just be offering a wee bit of our regular stuff with cameo appearances from a few of our main contributors over the past four years.  7 – 10pm – liquids AND nibbles will be at the centre of it all – donations to our main charity WaterAid will be happily accepted on the night

Friday 5 – 28 May – Hassocks Hash – back out on the open Downs Welcome to the forty-second consecutive Social Run. Put aside your petty tribal running differences and enjoy a jolly good yomp along the sides of the south Downs. Then re-liquidify yourselves with some of the Purple Carrot’s finest, and enjoy a bit-o-banter, plan your next 5km, marathon, mudbath, pub visit?


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